When you believe in yourself—your work, massage, the massage profession, your workplace and your clients—you will raise your professional confidence.
Think about a movie, store or place you love love love. I bet you find it easy to tell people about it, especially people who are looking for a good movie, store or place. It’s simple to share news about something we believe is valuable, especially to someone who wants that sort of thing.
Did you mount complicated explanations and arguments about how special the movie, store or place was and why someone should love it too? Maybe, but probably not. You probably simply spoke from the heart, from your own enthusiasm, and tried to convey how great the experience was for you. You may have even gone a step further and tied it to the interests of the person you were talking to.
That type of communication—enthusiastic, knowledgeable and meaningful—is the key to successfully marketing your massage practice. But first, of course, you have to actually believe in the value of yourself—your work, massage, the massage profession, your workplace and your clients.
Sadly, we can find ourselves derailed from that firm feeling of “I believe in myself” over time. In this article I will remind you why believing in all those aspects of your profession will elevate your professional confidence and provide a foundation for growth and happiness.
Believe in Yourself
There are a lot of ways you can lose faith in yourself. Working too hard for too long without enough support or without making enough money, for example, can easily erode your belief in yourself.
The steps to correct that are myriad. A vacation. A new modality. A pay increase. Going into (or out of) private practice. Changing your focus or even changing careers. Better sleep. A stronger social life. When you listen to your body, which one of those evokes the strongest reaction in your gut?
Maybe you do need to upgrade your skills if you’re not delivering the results and experience your clients want. Maybe you need a different kind of client to better fit your skills. At a minimum, give a massage to someone you trust to tell you the truth. Ask for their honest feedback.
If you’re someone who’s always struggled with believing in yourself, it’s probably time to seriously consider professional help. If we don’t believe in ourselves it’s almost impossible to convey the kind of confidence that helps clients feel secure.
Believe in Massage Therapy
It may seem far-fetched to lose your faith in massage as a tool for healing. It can happen. Maybe you need to change careers.
First, however, go get a massage or two, ideally from someone you don’t know. Remember what it feels like to be the client. Re-connect with the vulnerability and the hope. Remember what it feels like to have compassionate hands on your body. (Hopefully) re-experience the sheer pleasure of a skilled practitioner. Notice how your perspective on your day changes afterward (if it does).
Bonus: You may be able to take the cost of the massage as a tax deduction!
Believe in The Massage Profession
There’s the hands-on work we do, one-on-one, with clients. Then there’s our place in the larger profession we’re in with other massage therapists. All professions have conflict and different perspectives on the right way to go. All professions have some infighting, sniping and cliques.
If you find our industry discouraging, pick up a trade magazine and read a profile of someone doing great things. Listen to an industry podcast. Connect with a former classmate. Remember the excitement and pleasure of entering this field, of being part of something larger than yourself.
We are a relatively young profession in transition (forever, it sometimes seems).
The conflict comes because our members genuinely care about where we go and how we get there. It’s not always fun, but it does matter.
Believe in Your Workplace
Are you in private practice and it’s just not going well? Private practice can be tough—and worse, it can be very isolating. Do you know another massage therapist in private practice you can meet up with just to talk shop? Over the years, I have noticed massage therapists desperately need to just talk about what we do with people who truly understand what we do.
You may not think that applies to you, but go ahead and sit down with another massage therapist to talk shop, remembering the centrality of confidentiality to our work. See if you don’t have more to say than you thought you would.
Do you work for someone else, either as an employee or as an independent contractor? If your workplace is becoming a source of conflict or disillusionment for you, you’ve got to take a hard look at what you can change. Obviously, you can consider changing workplaces. You may also try talking to the owner and your coworkers if that seems wise.
Sadly, there aren’t easy answers to a workplace that is undermining your spirit. If you can’t fix it or leave it, can you split your time between the workplace and another massage setting so at least all your time isn’t spent in one place?
Believe in Your Clients
This one—believing in your clients—might seem like an odd concept. Let me say it differently: Ask yourself if the kind of clients you’re working with are a solid fit for you. There are various types of clients seeking different kinds of massage therapists. Are you attracting and working with the kind of client who best fits your skills and your personality? One size never fits all!
I just spent the weekend with another massage therapist friend, Kitty Southworth. We graduated from massage school together and have supported each other in our work for 23 years. I adore and admire her, but what we look for in a client base is completely different. We like doing different kind of work and helping people achieve very different outcomes. We each provide a very different experience.
If I had her client base, I would struggle to be happy in my work and the same is true for her and my client base. Are you working with the right kind of clients? Is your marketing or your employer’s marketing attracting your best-fit client? If you don’t know, it may be time to reach out to a business coach or other professional to help you connect with the right kind of client.
What Happens When You Don’t Believe in Yourself?
A loss of belief can lead to burnout, compassion fatigue, depression and other unpleasant experiences. It might become a crisis. Don’t let it get that far.
Do what you can to reconnect with—or discover anew—your belief, especially in yourself and the value of your work. When necessary, get professional help. You are worth it.
Our work can also be oddly isolating. That makes it important that you find ways to connect with colleagues who can encourage you and help you remember why you ought to believe in yourself.
There is a simple but hard truth here: You can’t ask your clients to believe in you if you don’t believe in you. You have to believe you’ve got something valuable to offer to do almost anything professionally. Build a practice. Do authentic marketing. Create a professionally appropriate relationship with your clients. Have a healthy referral network. Practice self-care consistently.
Listen to Your Heart
Believing in anything can be a slippery, tricky task. It’s not as simple as, for example, opening a reference book and showing someone where the supraspinatus attaches or helping them understand why they’re experiencing the pain they’re experiencing.
Belief requires accepting something you can’t scientifically point to. It requires listening to your heart and gut and daring to accept what they tell us.
Our work is so personal. It’s never as simple as, “I know muscles and that’s enough.” It’s not just what we know but who we are and what we bring into the massage room that makes or breaks our success. If you’re not walking in with confidence in what you have to offer, you will always struggle to be a success at this work.
About the Author
Kelly Bowers is the owner of the Healing Arts Business Academy. She is the author of four books: “The Affordable Massage Handbook,” “The Accidental Business Owner,” “Can I Deduct That,” and “Between Doormat and Diva.” She is a regular presenter at national conferences, an instructor in professional training programs, and an NCBTMB Approved CE Provider. She lives in Durham, North Carolina. She retired from hands-on bodywork in 2022 (NC 16669).